So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
