all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
My breasts were aching with rage.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
