so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dicks are not precious.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize