You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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