It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize