I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize