easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?