Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Actions speak louder than pants.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
