im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
