He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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