Don't you send me to vm
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
