If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
