So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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