Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Randomize
