The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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