so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize
