Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
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i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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