put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
