So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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