love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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