I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
