So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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