He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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