As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
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