I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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