Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
My dad is sitting where you rode me
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
