I just made out with a guy for $7.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
