I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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