So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found puke in my bra..
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize