Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I understand Curling. That high.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
