Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
