how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Randomize
