well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
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