Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
