There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize