i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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