Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
there is puke in my bra ... again
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