Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
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