i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
True college students do jello shots in the library
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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