OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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