i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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