I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
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