Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
We have started to decorate penises.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
