She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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