a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
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