...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
i think my cat just said my name.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
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