omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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