He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Randomize
