What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
