My Higher Power is John Stamos
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
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