I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize
